Friday, November 6, 2009

October 21, 2009

Have you ever woken up one morning and just felt something different in the air?

We had been married three years. Three wonderful, happy, capacity expanding years.

I first sensed it when our baby boy patted me good morning from the inside. I realized that this would be our last anniversary as just "us". ...a little bitter sweet, but mostly sweet.

Then I felt it again when I was driving to work-and this is what I saw.

I could feel it. With this sunrise came change.
I thought I was going to another day of work, and then we'd go to California to celebrate a sunrise in my sister's life, and we'd come back and I'd go to work again and Chase and I would keep living our lives...and it would change day by day, bit by bit.

I like change, I really do. But I like to anticipate it.
I like to ponder it, prepare for it, ready myself.
Then let the change ease itself in...
and its always a little hard leaving the old behind,
but the new is so exciting...a new adventure that brings more growth.
Sometimes it doesn't happen that way though.
Sometimes its sudden, and shocking, and it feels like you've got no control.
That kind of change is a lot harder to deal with.
But then you realize that you have a Heavenly Father who has a plan.
Not just for all of his children. for MY family. for ME.
He knows what is in store for us. And it is always wonderful-
better than we could choose for ourselves. Better than we can imagine.

But it is hard to give up that control sometimes. At least for me.
Sometimes we have to take a step forward.
into the shadows,
knowing that I don't have to see what is ahead
if I step in the direction Heavenly Father wants me to step.

So we did. Chase and I decided that it was time to be willing to do what Heavenly Father wanted...which we were always willing to do.

BUT we had to be willing to follow Him without seeing how it would work out.
Where will we live?
Where will Chase work?
What about the wonderful family we have in Boise?
What about the job/internship we have here?
What about our apartment in Boise?
Health insurance?
and on and on and on.
So we gave up trying to answer all of those questions before making a decision.

We had to excersise FAITH
and it was scary.
One day I was sitting in my office in Kyle's garage,
thinking of the redbox we'd pick up that night and what groceries I would buy for lunch.
The next day I was in Salt Lake City with no idea what we were doing or how it would work out.
But I knew that it would.
And it did.
Within three days I got a well paying job in Salt Lake that couldn't be more perfect,
we worked the details of leaving our Boise job with our wonderful boss (my brother),
Chase got hired at a Commercial Real Estate firm with salary and benefits (YAY!)
we've got a roof over our heads,
all the bills got paid,
and lots of family who love us.
But most of all, a Heavenly Father who blesses us
with more than we could even think to ask for
Life is good. Change is scary...
but so worth it.
Goodbye to our happy six months in Boise.
We loved living by and working with family
We loved the late, light summer evenings playing softball
We loved dinner and football at Mom and Dad's
We loved ditching work to swim in the pool
and watching Penny and Bear wrestle all day.
We loved watching Tayler grow and being around to help her do it.
We loved learning what we learned.
We'll be back to visit soon.
Thanks for everything Mom, Dad, Kaela, Kyle, Jade, and Tayler.
Love you, miss you.

Goodnight to yesterday,
Good morning to the sunrise
and a new day.


Taryn said...

Wow! It sounds like this did work out great! Where are you going to be working and are you going to continue after the baby is born? Sometimes it just amazes me how it all falls into place when we have faith in our Heavenly Father. I have actually been thinking about that a lot the past few days especially. When we decided it was finally time to have a baby I was worried it would take a long time, I was just graduating and where would I work? Would I get a job and have to leave them? Or would I get a good job and have to end up leaving my baby? It was just so overwhelming and I had no idea what to do. But we just...lept. And everything fell into place perfectly. I guess that is what happens when we follow the promptings of the spirit. Good luck with your continued transition! Hope I am able to see you when we come home in a few weeks!

Lacey said...

WOW Leah! I had no idea! I'm so glad that everything worked out so well for you. Life is so scary, a bunch of choices and most of the time we have no idea where they are headed. But we are always being guided, isnt it amazing?? I loved this blog post, your words were so beautifully put. Thanks for the good read :)

Boonie and Jenn said...

Oh Leah that is so beautiful! I am so glad that it all worked out for you. And this way hopefully we'll see you a little more :) I can't wait to see your cute tiny belly. Enjoy it cause I am missing being prego :( It is such a miracle and so fun to feel them kicking around inside. Then they are born and grow way to fast! Can't wait to see you, hopefully soon!

Dara said...

WOW! Leah!!! I'm SO happy for you guys!!! You and Chase have both been in our prayers. Best wishes for this new phase in your lives. God has amazing things planned for the both of you!

Beautiful blog post. Truly inspirational.

kami said...

happy anniversary! i still remember how beautiful your sealing was and was so glad i could be there!

i am glad you guys have been guided by the spirit in these tough decisions! best wishes for everything coming - it's all so exciting!! and i'm secretly jealous that you're in slc cuz i love it there :)

Jalene said...

Beautifully written, Leah! I loved it! So glad you are closer to us now. :)

Bri and Clarke said...

You are so inspirational Leah. I seriously cried just reading this. It just reminds me of how I felt when I was in your shoes. I think you are an amazing person. I just Luv ya. I had no idea that you guys were moving to SLC too, that is so sAweet!

David and Summer Jenkins said...

Leah- that was beautiful...and reminded me of one of the many reasons I love and admire yo. You have always had a faith-filled and optimistic outlook that is incredible. I am happy to here you are back in UT and would love a chance to see you in the near future. Maybe we could go on a double. You are a darling mommy-to-be and I just think you're awesome!